Sunday, January 13, 2008

Just Checking In






















Mama and Daddy just a couple weeks before she moved to heaven.



















Hi everyone. Just thought I'd check in. I haven't meant to take so long to thank you ALL for your prayers and encouraging words. They have meant so much, thank you. She was diagnosed with lung cancer on October 11th and 9 days later we found out it had also spread to her brain. Within 4 and a half weeks she was gone. I am still numb, and I'm not sure I've even really started to grieve yet. I've been keeping a journal and thats helped a lot I think. I have had trouble going to the cabin because me and mom had rearranged everything the day before she got really sick. I went day before yesterday but I couldn't stay long, it was bittersweet. Her tissues lay on the table and her coffee cup sat there also. The rocker was pulled up by the woodburning cookstove where she had left it, and the handle still sticking in the stove cap where she had lifted the lid to stoke the fire that day. It was a wonderful day though. We had found out 9 days before about the lung cancer, and the day after we had been to the cabin, she got sick and thats when we found out about the brain cancer. It just all happened so fast. Bless her heart, she moved the spinning wheel where she wanted it and the table and my great granny's trunk. My little cabin is just the way she thought it should be and that's the way it will stay. My precious daddy and mommy had a wonderful relationship and was so in love. He would still bring her flowers, every week he'd go and buy her a rose. They were like young sweethearts all the time. Watching my daddy's grief has been harder to bare than dealing with my own grief. Thanks again for your prayers.

17 comments:

~~Deby said...

....I have been praying for you..I KNOW this grief so well...it will be two years March 3rd...and 6 weeks prior to that my younger brother died....and now I have another younger brother with brain cancer....
There are no answers...you cry when you want...I once went to the cememtary and took a helium plain balloon....and wrote things to my mom all over it...messages to her...some thought it stupid, for me it was release...I ask Jesus to tell her things...
This I KNOW my mom is in Heaven..none of us know the rest...so you do what you need to do to heal...and IF you ever need someone who KNOWS this part of life..please email me..I would be happy to call you..pray with you and in the meantime..I share your grief.
Deby
yesipray at comcast dot net

Donna said...

I'm so sorry and will continue to pray for you.
Donna

Beemoosie said...

Thank you for sharing, sweetie. I can't imagine what you are going through...just know you are in my prayers.
XXXOOO
B

Susan said...

Oh Mikki Jo I can hear your pain and all I can do is say "I care". I know it's not much but it's real and sincere and all I can offer.
Pain consumes us at times like this and that is okey.
Susan

~*Marie*~ said...

Mikki, I am sure that those memories of her mean so much to you, that she shares that special place with you. I will continue to keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

Alpicks Treasures said...

Mikki, Stay Strong for your dad. His loss is greater in his own way. Its hard to say goodby to our loved ones,something I am still working on. We are in your thoughts and prayers. She is watching down on you. In 5 years time I lost my Dad, Brother and Mom. Take care of yourself.

Mary L. Briggs said...

So glad to hear from you, Mikki Jo. You and your family are still in my prayers. The cabin will always be a very special place to you, now. What a precious memory to have from that day! Hope to hear more from you soon. God Bless You!

Tina Leavy said...

sending a big hug your way.

Dena said...

I found your blog this evening by hopping from one to another. I am so sorry for your loss. There are no words strong enough I know... but know that you are in my prayers.

Hugs,
Dena

Anonymous said...

Dear Mikki,
I was wondering how you have been.
Take all the time you need to think of your mom, to be with your dad, but please take good care of yourself, your Mom would like that too.
Hugssss
Corinne

Candy Duell said...

I have been thinking of you lately too. I hope you and your family are doing ok. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Cape Cod Washashore said...

I've been thinking of you, Mikki Jo. I know your dear sweet mother is with the Lord, where there is no suffering and no grief. You and your family have my continued prayers.

Ms. Wendy's Antiques said...

Mikki Jo, I am so sorry for the loss of your wonderful mother. She certainly was beautiful. I got goosebumps when you said the sun came out the day she passed. God has a way of comforting us when we need it most. I can't even remember how I found your blog, but I am glad I did.
Hugs,Cindy
Forloveofhome

Super B's Mom said...

I am so sorry to hear of your loss. You are in my thoughts.

May God comfort you.

Grand Life said...

Our thoughts and prayers are with you. I didn't get a chance to tell my Daddy goodbye but he knew I loved him.

TO BECOME said...

I feel so bad about your Mama. I know you must have loved her so much. I can recall the feeling that I had when my Mom went on to be with the Lord. Many times I reached for the phone to call her and even today, my first thoughts are of her when something wonderful happens that I want to share. One day though, we will both see our Mamas again and there will be no more tears and no parting over there. connie from Texas

God bless and keep you and get you and your family through this very sad time.

Gayla said...

I am very sorry to hear about your mom. I lost my sweet daddy last August. Can not believe it has almost been a year. Hugs.